| Location | Surrey |
| Age | 0 |
| Date of Birth | 7/2006 |
| Date of Death | 7/2006 |
| Visitors | 2,867 since 26/08/2006 |
| Creator |
My beautiful little star was born sleeping on the 18th july 2006 at 7:30 in the morning.
Tyler was a week overdue when i went to the hospital with contractions.
I had a show early saturday morning, i was a bit concerned as there was a slight tinge of green in
the blood,so i called up the hospital and the midwife over the phone asked me if he was moving ok, i
said 'yes he was moving fine',i was then told to put a sanitry towel on, and come down to
the hospital when i started to have pains that were at least 6 minutes apart or if the baby started
to move less then usuall.
It was'nt untill saturday evening that the pains started to get more frequent and i was
beginning to get uncomfortable that i could'nt sit still.
After about an hour of trying to watch the telly my boyfriend matt asked me if i wanted to go to the
hospital and as my pains were coming about every 8 minutes i thought 'why not' this was my
first pregnancy and i did'nt really know what to expect.
On our way to the hospital we stopped off to get some snacks as we was'nt to sure how long we
would be there.
Matt asked me if i was nervous, although i was nervous i was more excited then anything else,
thinking about the pain did'nt really bother me as they had drugs for that.
I just could'nt wait to meet him,cuddle and kiss him, dress him in all his lovely clothes and
show him off to people.
When we were at the hospital i was strapped up to a machine that monitors the babys heartbeat and
that keeps track of your contractions.
Everything was fine his heartbeat was normal.
But according to this midwife i could'nt be in labour as i was'nt crying,and after being
kept on the machine for 10 minutes she told me i could go home.I was a bit disappointed and i asked
her if she could just check how far dilated i was.
When she told me i was only 1cm gone,i felt she said it almost as though she was being a bit smug,
as though to say 'i told you you werent in labour'.I also mentioned the tinge of green i
had seen that morning,i gave her my sanitry towel and she took a quick look at it and put it in the
bin and said i was ok to go.
so i went home.
The next day was a sunday and this was to be the worst day of my life as it was today that i found
out that my little star had died.
I spent the whole day at my 5 year old brother's school fair, it was only till later that
evening that my mum asked me how i was feeling and had i felt the baby move that much today.I
thought about it for a minute and the stupid thing was i could'nt remember a time when he had
moved that day but i was still getting pains so i thought i was ok and this was all normal.
We went to the hospital straight away anyway so we could just be sure.
When we got there me and matt were taken in to the same room as the night before and the midwife got
out this piece of equipment that id seen many times before as you can listen to the sound of the
babys heartbeat,she put it on my stomach and there was nothing,i paniced straight away as everytime
before i could hear his heartbeat so clearly,i started to cry and matt told me not to worry,and the
midwife said she heard something but she was going to bring in the ultra sound machine to have a
proper look.
Again there was nothing,still she told me not to worry she was just going to get the consultant. My
crying was uncontrolable by now and i could see matt was too beginning to get upset.
When the consultant came in and had a look,he could'nt even say that my baby had died he just
looked at me and mumbled 'i am sorry'.
Everything after that was a bit of a blur, i could'nt accept that he was gone, i mean i'd
only bin there the night before and everything had been ok how could he be dead, we had come so far
he was a week overdue.
I had to have a natural birth and i think that apart from having my baby cremated it was one of the
hardest things i had to do.Throughout the whole time i was in labour i kept wishing that they had
been wrong and that i was going to hear him cry and get to take him home.I'll never understand
why these things happen a baby is the most innocent,precious thing that anybody will ever have.
When i saw Tyler he was so small and beautiful he was perfect, the time i spent with him was so hard
but it was also the most precious i just could'nt stop looking at him and kissing him. I
could'nt believe i had created such a beautiful little person.
Six weeks have past now, and i miss him more everyday,no matter what i do he is always on my mind
and i am always thinking 'what if i had done this' or 'what if i had done that'.
I cant help but blame myself and i hate myself for what has happened.
People say that time is a great healer but i don't think that i can be healed. As time goes on
you just have to accept that this aint a nasty dream its real and that you have to live with it,
cause there is nothing you can do to bring them back.
The only thing that keeps me going is to believe that he was to special for this world and when i
die i will be with him again.
I have never felt a love and pain like i do now and will have to live with forever untill i am with
Tyler again. No other baby will replace him and he will always be in my heart nobody can take him
from there. I never knew a love like this exsisted. There is nothing in this world that means more
to me then he does he will always be my angel,my little star my beautiful baby boy and i love him to
the stars and back.
There's not a day that passes
That i don't sit and cry,
And look to heaven for a reason
But still i don't know why.
Could'nt he of waited
Another year or two
Untill you were a little older
And id had more time with you.
Forgive me lord i then say,
All these thoughts are wrong,
There had to be a reason
And i know i must be strong.
Your in the arms of jesus now
And i know that you'll be fine,
But i wish with all my heart
That those arms could be mine.
I love you Tyler and mummy misses you so much
Love you always and forever
Love mummy
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
missing you
My beautiful baby boy....there is not a day that passes that I dont sit there and think of you and what should have and could have been! Life still seems so unfair and I feel as tho you were so wrongly and crawley taken away from me, time hasnt heeled my pain, just as time has gone on I have learnt how to carry my grief instead of my grief carrying me... You are the most amazing mirical that has ever happend to me, in the short time I had with you, you taught me so much you showed me what real unconditonal love is and i would never swap the lifelong pain that I will feel for the rest of my life in to never of having you, you are my angel, my littlestar my first baby and you will always have half of my heart up there with you.
Happy 3rd birthday darling mummy loves you so so much... give nanny a kiss for me and watch over your little brother Nathan x x x
SKY BUNNIES
() ()
('.')
(')_(')
The sky is full of bunny clouds
So soft and fat and white,
I wonder if they're hiding eggs
For angels to find with delight.
Because angels like Easter as well, you know,
And there's no reason why
There shouldn't be an Easter hunt
In meadows in the sky.
----------------------✲
---------------------- ▌
-@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
-{*~*~*~*~*~*HAPPY~*~*~*~*~*~}
-{~*~*~*~*~*EASTER*~*~*~*~*~*}
-{*~*~*~*~*~*ANGEL~*~*~*~*~*~}
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
*
___________________H ello
__________________I Have
_________________Com e Here
________________To Wish You
_______________Merry Christmas
______________And Also, A Happy
_____________New Year To You For
____________2009... I Hope The New
___________Year Brings You Loads Of
__________Happiness And Lots Of Fun.
_________I Hope You Have A Nice Day On
________Christmas Day, Filled With Lots Of
_______Angel Time.......And Of Course Eating
______Lots Of Nice Foods, And Candies. I Hope
_____That Santa Is Good To You As Well And He
___Brings You Loads Of Presents On Christmas Day
_________________XXX (\ ●♥● /)
_________________XXX ( \(_)/ )
_________________XXX (_ /|\ _)
_________________XXX ../___\
sending you lots of love and hugs for christmas xxxxxxx
from 1 mum to another xxx
I sit alone and my thoughts turn to you sweet angel ,
you know you are carried with me ,where ever i am what ever i do
i love you my precious angel , my precious child
xxx
♥ * Just * X . ♥
X . . * ♥ . * ♥. * X
♥ X*Sprinkling* . ♥
X. . * ♥ . X * . * ♥.
♥.X *Your * Page X* ♥
X . ♥ * . ♥ * . * X.*
♥.* X With * Some.* X. ♥
. * ♥ * * X . *+ * X ♥ X
X ♥ * . Love ♥ . * X ♥
Happy birthday lil man xx
----------------()—()- -()—()
-------------||--||- -||—||—||
-----------{*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~}
----------@@@@@@@@@@ @@@
-------{~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~}
------@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@
---{~*~*~*~*~HAPPY~* ~*~*~*~}
---{~*~*~*~ BIRTHDAY! ~*~*~*~}
---{~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*~*~*~}
---@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@
On a hill in the distance
A young boy quietly waits
Patiently he watches
For his family at the gates
His blue eyes shine so brightly
As hope swells within
For soon he'll see his loved ones
And never part again
How joyous will be the meeting
As mother holds her child
And father kisses softly
The angel-his long lost child
Once more they'll hold each other
And tears will be no more
Forever they'll be together
As they pass through heaven's door.
I'm just a little baby
Who didn't quite make it there;
I went straight to be with Jesus,
and I am waiting for you here.
Don't you worry about me mommy,
I am of all God's lambs most blessed;
I would have loved to stay with you,
but the Shepherd knows whats best.
So dear mommy, don't you sorrow,
wipe those tears and chase the gloom,
I went to be with Jesus,
Straight from my mommy's womb.
Thank-you for the life you gave me,
it was brief but I don't complain;
I have all of Heaven's glories,
Will suffer none of the earthly pain.
Daddy gave me something for you,
It's our secret, Mommy dear,
He pressed it tight against my forhead,
and he whispered in my tiny ear.
I'll be waiting for you, Mommy,
For You and Daddy both.
I'll be with you forever,
Then I'll give you Daddy's kiss.
_______________00___00__ ______________
______________00____ _00_______________
_____________00_____ __00______________
____________00______ ___00_____________
0000000000000____* I *____00000000000000
_00________*WANTED.. TOO*__________00__
___00_________ * BE..THE *_________00____
_____00_____ * FIRST..TOO* _______00______
_______00______*WISH *________00________
_________00____*YOU. .A*_____00_________
________00____* MERRY*_____00________
_______00____ *CHRISTMAS *___00_______
______00_______0 0000 0_______00______
_____00_____00______ ____00____00_____
____00___00_________ _______00__00____
___0000_________FROM __________0000___
__00____________sharon ___________
So sorry
Hi hayley, am so sorry to read you lost your mum, am absolutley gobsmacked, how can god be so cruel, Reece, s nanny ( my sister) went to be a angel in May, very suddenly, so you and my neice have not only lost your beautiful babies but your mums as well. Although in similar circumstances i really dont know what to say to you. My thoughts are with you and your family. Im sure your thinking like my neice, Leanne, they are safe in their nannies arms. Love to you Hayley take care hun x x x x
Gorgeous Baby Boy!! Another Hand Picked Angel For Gods Garden!! Sleep Tight Sweetheart xxx
Ask My Mum How She Is
My Mum, she tells a lot of lies,
She never did before.
But from now until she dies,
She'll tell a whole lot more.
Ask my Mum how she is
And because she can't explain,
She will tell a little lie
Because she can't describe the pain.
Ask my Mum how she is,
She'll say 'I'm alright.'
If that's the truth, then tell me,
why does she cry each night?
Ask my Mum how she is,
She seems to cope so well.
She didn't have a choice you see,
Nor the strength to yell.
Ask my Mum how she is,
'I'm fine, I'm well, I'm coping.'
For God's sake Mum, just tell the truth,
Just say your heart is broken.
She'll love me all her life,
I loved her all of mine.
But if you ask her how she is,
She'll lie and say she's fine.
I am Here in Heaven.
I cannot hug from here.
If she lies to you don't listen,
Hug her and hold her near.
On the day we meet again,
We'll smile and I'll be bold.
I'll say, 'You're lucky to get in here, Mum,
With all the lies you told.
Tyler doesn't have any gifts yet. Why not be the first to add one?
Click here to leave Tyler a gift
All proceeds from gifts go to the upkeep of GoneTooSoon and help keep this site free.
Create an ever lasting memorial for your loved ones.
Start here »
Using the options below you can add this memorial to your personal garden.
| I am Tyler's ... | |
| Add to Garden: | |
| Notifications: | Text Message |
There have been 593 candles lit for Tyler.
